b was gone for almost 48 hours and i'm so glad he's home. i have a fatalistic bloodline running from my tip to my toes. i know a woman married to a cop. i asked her if she ever sleeps when he is gone. i go there, she said. i imagine the worst and follow the spiral including who i would call, how i would tell the kids, where i would go. once i go there, i'm fine. and i can sleep. because i feel like i'm sort of in control.
i have heard myself say out loud recently that i am an avid reader. i haven't finished a book in months. i've got a family member who just started chemo and another one about to give birth. in the past six months, i have made new friends. that's the first time that has happened in years. do you ever wonder, when you make new friends, if their version of you and your old friends' version of you match? if they overlap? or are we merely playing multiple roles of epic variations?