Monday, January 28, 2013
tomorrow she will wake up and be 5. five.
i like to think of things in five year increments. one hand. if curled up, a fist. it is something i can understand, the palm of a hand. something i can relate to. something i can look at and think...
ah, yes. i remember meeting you.
my daughter is now more her own than mine at all. i talk to her and spend the majority of my time with her and yet...i am closer and closer to knowing her less and less as time goes on. i'll never really know how she sees things, how she feels. i will know what i intuit, i will know what she says. i will know her through the filter of me and i know for a fact that i will be the mother who tries to understand her angst through my own. i will always feel like she is the most important girl in my life, even as my status in hers shifts and molds to her needs. i will always be her biggest fan, her biggest support. i will always be on her side. even when she draws a fence between us. for now, i will breathe in her need to be involved at all times, her need to have my attention, her need to be validated in the minutiae. i will look back five years from now and i will remember how we made cupcakes and i wrapped her presents to open tomorrow while she was in preschool and how she went to bed saying tomorrow is going to be the BEST DAY EVER! i am going to wake up and i am going to be FIVE!
Posted by krista at 10:54 PM